Tonight I was thinking about my "crazy." That's all I can think of to call it--my "crazy." Those moments when I think and act and talk weirdly and stupidly. When nothing seems right and everything seems wrong and my head is spinning and racing and blank all at the same time. I encountered my "crazy" again this afternoon. Those are the times I hate myself so much that I can't think of any productive coping skills to make me better again. Usually the best I can do is wait in mental agony for my "crazy" to leave. I needed to express myself today. I was able to write a poem tonight. A poem I really liked. It's called "Slowly, Silently"
Like a cunning snake it enters
Slowly
Silently
It embraces me
Like a warm winter coat
Unnoticed it begins to constrict
Slowly
Silently
One tiny inch at a time
It's squeezing the life out of me
On the verge of certain death, I panic
I struggle and try to escape
But it continues
Slowly
Silently
Until finally I resign myself
To my sealed-in fate
And just when I think my last breath has gone
It stops
The grip loosens
Slowly
Silently
I rejoice in my freedom
Prepare for my release
I relax
Like a cunning snake it comes back
Slowly
Silently
2 comments:
yes, a perfect poem for the feeling you described. perfect.
It came to me while I was walking down the street. It's hard when that happens because I have the urge to sit right down on the sidewalk and pull out a piece of paper and write it down.
Not sure where the thought came from, but it really did seem perfect. Kind of describing the cycle of how it comes and goes and it stays for so long that I get comfortable with it. Then it goes and I'm exuberant, but slowly it sneaks back in until I realize that I'm back where I was before...
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