How Do I Do This?

I can't sleep. I feel sick all the time. So I don't eat. Finally I get hungry and eat. Then I get sick. I cry. I cry so much. I sob. I pace around the house. I call every person I can think of. But I don't want to talk. I don't know what to say. Whatever's left of my time is spent in shock. I'm numb and I stare at the walls. Why? Because I have to say goodbye. I'm not ready. I wasn't prepared for this. It's not something we talked about. It's not a gradual goodbye. It's an I'm-getting-a-new-job goobye. It's an I'm-leaving-next-week goodbye. It's a suddenly-you're-on-your-own goodbye. I know she's not leaving me. I know she's moving on to bigger and better things. I know she wants to follow her passion. But why does it have to leave me behind? I've trusted her with my deepest, darkest secrets. I've bared my soul to her. I've clung to her in my dark moments. She's given me hope. She's pushed me to do things I didn't think I could do. She's taught me so much. And just like that, I have to say goodbye. Maybe it's stupid that I feel so upset over this. I've never trusted anyone as much as I trust her. I've never told anyone the things I've told her. I've never connected with someone like I've connected with her. And Tuesday is the last day I'll get to see her. I've never had a therapist like her. Everyone says I'll find someone else I can trust like I trust her. But it's not that simple. I had an instant connection with her. I don't find that with just anyone. And so for now I'm alone. Not completely alone. I have friends (though not many anymore) and I have Art Awakenings. But I still feel very alone. I don't even know what to do with myself anymore.